Lets H-up

12/20/10

By Christopher Smith

Most often than usual when the idea of young adults courting each other arises the idea of roses, chocolates, movie theaters, and restaurants rise in the mind; unless asking a college student like 19 year old Vinquez Askew a sophomore at Norfolk State University “I go to the bar, find a chick, get her a drink, an hour later I’m taking her home that’s what I call hooking up.”

There is a new saying for an age old act once called one night stands or no strings attached. The new phrase on college campuses around the nation including Towson University is “hooking up and hanging out.” Instead of the occasional fool around or one partner commitment, individuals continually “hook up” with various partners.  With the Towson University male to female ratio approximately at 40 percent to 60 percent it could easily be assumed that college men take advantage of these numbers.

Men-Women Who likes it More?

“There are a lot of hot girls on this campus and the ratio only betters my odds of becoming close with them,” said Keith Perkins, 20 year old sophomore of Towson University, “All of my other guy friends are on the same page as me as well.”

From the opposite gender perspective another sophomore has a differing opinion of hooking up “It depends on the person,” said 20 year old Leni Phillips, “I know some girls that can find a guy hook up with him and after that be friends and that’ll be it, but others get so attached to someone that they can’t hook up with you…like if their person went out and did someone else they would be so upset, heartbroken.”

Both college men and women partake in the activity of hooking up according to center.americanvalues.org. The results of a national survey show that 40 percent of women have experienced a hook up. “Males benefit more,” said Family Studies professor of Towson University Sharon Duncan Jones-Eversley, “they don’t like commitment, and they don’t want the stress, they don’t want the work…looking at pure demographics, five women to one man, so purely looking at it from face value they benefit a lot from it. Women don’t, but I think they equally participate in it.”

To all rules and thoughts about majorities there are always exceptions. “I’ve been in a relationship for a year and three months,” said Gershon Fredericks 19 year old sophomore, “Most of my friends are actually in relationships there are only a couple that aren’t, and when we hang out with our girlfriends they kind of feel left out.” Gershon represents the category of college men in steady relationships, “I’m actually enjoying my relationship fully; I’m glad I’m with her and glad we met in college.”

Why get Hooked?

Professor Jones also helps explain some of the reasons why individuals partake in this particular lifestyle rather than the traditional date. “There was always the expectation of you court or you date someone with the thought of marriage and a lot of people both male and female are delaying marriage,” Jones said, “…from a social economic perspective, dating and courting people whether it’s for a long time relationship or for marriage can be pretty costly…if you go to Mcdonald’s for two people minus the two happy meals you’re going to be spending about $15 to $20 so at a restaurant you will be spending 40. So purely for economics it makes sense to hook up and hang out.”

What the professor says about delayed marriage is true, according to the Census the median age for men getting married is 27.1 years, 3.6 years up in the past 30 years. And the median age for women getting married is 25.3 years which is up 4.2 years in the past 30.

What can go Wrong?

This lifestyle has been receiving more and more attention with concerns on sexually transmitted infection rates among other things affecting the young adults participating in these hooking up activities which may outweigh the positives.

“The emotional turmoil that comes along with being sexually engaged with someone without any emotional or social attachment, that’s not how relationships develop and I don’t think were wired that way.” Jones said “I think the long term impact on relationship building becomes very different for individuals who are actively involved in hooking up and hanging out, on the surface are emotionally deficit but in reality they become emotionally and socially devastated.”

With these factors it shows that the positives and negatives can go hand in hand, a spontaneous decision can physically and emotionally last longer than one night.